What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Sarepta reports second patient death after treatment with Duchenne gene therapy - statnews.com

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Is Trump the greatest spiritual leader since Jesus?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Why do flat Earthers run away like whipped dogs with their tails between their legs when asked simple questions that expose their delusions as fantasy?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

What do men like to be given for their birthday?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Is TikTok becoming a platform for soft porn?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Why is Eric Clapton so roundly disliked among guitarists?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Why would the state lie about the Earth's shape? We know that it's flat, but why do they lie and tell us that it is a sphere?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Ridley Scott's New Sydney Sweeney Thriller Tops the Streaming Charts After Just 1 Day - Comic Book Resources

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

TEXT:

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Why are right-wing commentators spreading conspiracy theories about Haitians eating local pets in Springfield, Ohio?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Make Nazis afraid again!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

What were my 10 favorite great rock albums that were either forgotten or hardly known by the rock community at large during 1965-‘75?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

What is the rudest/meanest thing a family member has said to you?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …